Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Failing London: A Tale of Two Sisters

My sister came to visit me in London for her Spring Break. On the bus from the airport, she informed me that all of her friends were so jealous because they were only going to Cancun or Miami for spring break, and she was going to Europe! I was very pleased that I could provide my sister with such a envy-inducing trip. I had long been planning on taking her on what I called the "Winning London Tour," which covered all the sites that Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen visit in their movie "Winning London."

Eating Noodles with Buddha: A Vienna Encounter

Things happen for a reason.

It's important to tell yourself this when you're getting screamed at. The Nachmarket vendors are very unsympathetic towards tired tourists who sit at their tables without buying things from their stands. So my friends and I were forced to take our noodles elsewhere.

We settled on a train bridge near the market and ate in silence. We had spent the past 58 hours together and believed there was nothing left to be said. After a couple of minutes we were joined by a stranger, an attractive backpacker in his late 20s or early 30s. He was also eating under similar banished-by-the-vendor circumstances and to make the proximity less awkward, he introduced himself. Name: Gregor. Nationality: German. Occupation: Musician. Status: In a serious relationship. This last detail was a slight disappointment to my friends and I, however at that time we were all going though some pretty heavy and diverse relationship issues, so it was refreshing to talk to a guy whose main intention was casual company rather than sleazy flirting. Admittedly, the reason we were so keen to make conversation with the stranger was because he was good looking. The sad but oh-so-true reality is that people are more likely to trust you if you're attractive.

The Importance of Being Earnest in My Defense of Oscar Wilde's Tomb

While wandering around Paris, my friend mentioned that we weren't far from Oscar Wilde's tombstone, and since our hopes of going into the catacombs had just been squashed by an enormous line, we were provided with the perfect opportunity to visit Mr. Wilde.

Some important things before I continue: First, The Picture of Dorian Gray is one of my favorite books and I have seen The Importance of Being Earnest several times. Second, as a writer I still hold on to the delusion that authors can be celebrities like Oscar Wilde (or Byron or J.K. Rowling, to name a few). Lastly, you may know that Oscar Wilde's grave is covered in lipstick, because it is tradition to kiss his tombstone.

Friday, April 6, 2012

An Apology From This Innocent Bystander

Dear Reader,

I've recieved a lot of complaints from friends and family, expressing their disappointment that I have not written a single blog post in over two months. Let me first apologize for the suspense. I hope your frustration has not lead you to give up on our technological relationship, and I certainly dread the idea that you have imagined me dead, ill, or simply too depressed to write. Quite the contrary. I have found myself so flooded with new experiences that every attempt to write them down has resulted in a disappointment in my own story telling. I find myself overwhelmed by recent events that a monstrous writers block has devoured all creativity.