Search for a Solution to a Solitary State

I'd like to disclaim some rumors that I probably started with my last blog post, "Spending in London." I'm not stumbling around miserably in London. I had a few short hiccups with public transportation at the very beginning of my journey.

It's easy to get bummed out when you're in a foreign country by yourself. It's easy to write a pessimistic blog about it. Before I begin, let me just say: this isn't a pessimistic blog post.

The first day here, I was so jet lagged and focused on getting registered for classes that I basically collapsed in my bed without giving London much of a second thought. Second day comes around and suddenly I'm well rested (12 hours rested to be specific) and eager for company.


Easier felt than done. I got on the tube, sitting directly across from perfectly normal, functional British citizens, and they look everywhere but at me. The first few times this happened to me, I assumed they were shy people, lacking confidence. After seven or eight times of this, I realized what was happening. The British had confronted me with a major cultural difference: eye contact. The British avoid eye contract at all costs. What I mistook for a lack of confidence was a difference in upbringing. In America, if you don't look someone in the eye, it's assumed that you're guilty of something. In Britain, it's assumed that you're being forward. And probably a foreigner.

So in the beginning, it's easiest to make friends with other foreigners.

I had a few strikes before I hit the ball. The first girl I met lived across the hall from me. From Georgetown, pretty, and, like me, new to the city. I had my door open to the hallway (a proactive step on my part, seeing as everyone else had theirs closed) and she came in asking to use my outlet. "Aha!" I thought. "I know something she doesn't." Because the outlets here have switches. If they're not on, the outlet does not letout electricity. As soon as I pointed this out to her, she thanked me, ran back to her room, and shut the door.

Nice.

I didn't give up. I gave her a ten minute grace period before waltzing over to her room and inviting her to hang out. Within ten minutes of talking in my room we both realized we didn't like each other at all. I can make a rough guess as to how this happened, on my end at least. Somehow the girl brought the subject around to her experience a couple of nights previous, when she'd been sitting in the Computer Lab and a French boy asked her out for a drink.

Sweet, I thought. This girl's gonna have a cheesy romantic story everyone dreams about when traveling to a foreign county.

Nope. She spent the next ten minutes complaining about this date with a gorgeous French boy on her second day in London. The language barrier is an obvious problem in these situations, but usually this just means a fast forward to more...physical pursuits.

"Did you kiss him?" I asked, hoping to shift the direction of her story to a happier ending.

"Yeah, he tried to kiss me in the middle of an intersection," she scoffed. The open book that I am, she probably read my confusion at her tone and continued, "I don't know what it's like where you're from, but in Washington that's considered trashy."

I clenched my teeth to prevent my mouth from dropping open. Didn't she know that the French kiss each other to say "hello," that they're considered the most romantic country in the Western world? I couldn't believe that such an amazing opportunity was wasted on a stuck-up child.

Needless to say, our friendship didn't last. She went back to her room to skype with her friends back home.

After a few more meetings with incompatible people, I ran into a friendly girl who invited me to pancakes at our floor's kitchen. Before I knew it, I was talking to a group of twelve or so students from all around the world, eating pancakes and nutella. A good formula for making friends in a new situation:

A medium sized group with balanced number of men and women + shared food and drink to relax + charades/other silly game that lowers inhibitions = a damn good time.

These good times create a rush that makes you feel like you've known someone for years. I've only been here five days and already I've been around the city with this group, taking in such classic sites as Big Ben, Trafalgar Square, and Westminster Abbey. There's something to be said for finding positive, proactive friends in a foreign city. They make the whole experience much more memorable.